Wednesday, February 14, 2007

away

I have been away a long while and am still away. I'm in San Diego right now in the first week of an eight week course in polygraphy.


I don't know what the hell is going on.


I feel like I'm a million miles from my wife and my home and all that I hold dear, and I'm equally far from whatever this place, this blog used to mean to me. Not to say that I don't miss it, or miss you guys (whoever may still be reading...), but I've certainly been away and continue to be.


I guess it's normal to experience this ebb and flow kind of thing. Right now I'm rereading Moore's Care of The Soul and so I feel very comfortable just wallowing in my own kind of loneliness and solitude, but at the same time I feel strongly that I've let things go too long and that all the people I get such a thrill from won't be hanging out any longer.


This post should be enough to drive the last of you away.




I am happy and although I feel completely disconnected from my own life, I am able to enjoy a lot of what is going on around me. I am grateful to be learning this new skill, and glad for the opportunities it will present for me.


But I miss my real self.


I miss art.


I miss connection with the oddball.



You, especially.




All best-


tearful

14 Comments:

Blogger jz said...

hi scott --

we are all away sometimes.

glad to know you are still out there, somewhere.

jz

1:05 PM  
Blogger K said...

i'm just glad you are alive.

9:33 PM  
Blogger james said...

scott ... i still drop by every day, hoping to find you home again. and this morning, mirabile dictu, here you are, in full voice and not a whit less lonely and anxious. welcome back, dear friend ... it's so good to see you again. have we been worried? hell yes.

7:34 AM  
Blogger LKD said...

I was going to say something here, but anything I'd say in this little box, you already know.

So, it will go unsaid.

You know, friend.

You know.

10:22 PM  
Blogger LKD said...

I was going to say something here, but anything I'd say in this little box, you already know.

So, it will go unsaid.

You know, friend.

You know.

10:22 PM  
Blogger LKD said...

I was going to say something here, but anything I'd say in this little box, you already know.

So, it will go unsaid.

You know, friend.

You know.

10:23 PM  
Blogger LKD said...

I was going to say something here, but anything I'd say in this little box, you already know.

So, it will go unsaid.

You know, friend.

You know.

10:23 PM  
Blogger LKD said...

I was going to say something here, but anything I'd say in this little box, you already know.

So, it will go unsaid.

You know, friend.

You know.

10:23 PM  
Blogger LKD said...

I was going to say something here, but anything I'd say in this little box, you already know.

So, it will go unsaid.

You know, friend.

You know.

10:24 PM  
Blogger tearful dishwasher said...

Hey, everybody!


I feel like Sally Fields right now, so if you'll excuse me I'm just going to
go drink a glass of cold water.



Thanks.


You totally fucking rock.




It is good, good, good to have friends.






*

12:46 PM  
Blogger 21k said...

hey hey! I'm a bit late to the welcome home party, but it's good to see ya, you betcha, glad you're ok

4:08 PM  
Blogger Radish King said...



This post should be enough to drive the last of you away.


Nice try buster.

xo

4:10 PM  
Blogger LKD said...

um, hell....

somethin' ain't right here...

sigh...

9:55 PM  
Blogger jz said...

yeah...what Laurel said...and said...and said.

Ditto.

10:49 AM  

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