Sunday, July 31, 2011

Watching It Burn



*

I was reading Meg Hitchcock's blog yesterday. I stumbled upon her blog through my wife, who has been following her for a while now. Anyway, I was reading something she wrote a couple of years ago, about destruction, and it struck a chord with me. She's a fine writer and an amazing artist, keenly observant and intelligent and quite mad. I was smitten.

Anyhoo.

Destruction.


So feared, that. The loss of the thing we believe we need. For happiness, for safety, for keeping things the same. But without destruction there can be no renewal, no room for growth, for what is trying to be born.

What Meg said was that we need to begin seeing destruction not as the end of a thing, but as a needed first step in the birth of something new.

It's obvious, I suppose. 


*



Like a lot of obvious things, it's easier to articulate than to embody.



*



I love destruction myself. Okay, that's not quite accurate. I am fascinated by it, that's closer to the truth. It thrills and terrifies me, both.


And I suppose it's because I know that I'm not immune from it. I will be disarticulated and disassembled in the end, turned into worm food, all my precious thoughts and tender longings. My fierce heart stilled.


That day is waiting out there, who knows how near or far.



*



In the meantime, I yet live and love. All the more wildly for having to lose it. 








*



It don't seem fair, but it does seem fitting.



*



Namaste.



***





5 Comments:

Blogger Mel said...

Very thought provoking. My mom's a hoarder in denial, and I often wish for a fire or tornado to whisk all her crap away, so she can see that none of that matters, that none of that is making her happy, it's ruining her and it's ruined our relationship because she's not present in her life, just hiding behind her stuff. I know I should feel guilty for this but I don't.
Anyway, your post made me think about that secret wish, along with a dozen other things. Thanks for thinking all these deep thoughts and shining some light on the real things. Now off I go to click your links.

10:50 PM  
Blogger tearful dishwasher said...

PF-

indeed! thanks for coming by.



Mel-


Hording seems to be one of the hardest compulsions to break. We are all of us trapped by our own stuff, though. Its just that you can see it with horders more easily.

But that's what it looks like inside our minds, each of us, drowning and trapped by our stuff, our thoughts, our habits of mind, our grudges and false gods and nursed wounds and on and on....

And terrified we'll lose something of value, terrified it won't be enough to protect us in the end, or even right now, and of course, we're right.

It won't ever be enough.

Just like folks who hoard what can be seen and stacked to the ceiling, our fear is perhaps the ultimate driver.


I think I'll pick today to begin mentally uncluttering.


I'm giving away my thoughts!


yrs-


tearful

6:56 AM  
Blogger Mel said...

Tearful,

Yes. Exactly. Thank you for giving me these thoughts to ponder. I hoard too, I suppose, mine's just invisible. I need to be less angry with her, and more understanding of her fear. We're not all the same amount of strong, are we? Here's to a productive spell of uncluttering. Thank you for the clarity.

Love,

Mel

7:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's beautiful Scott - Mary

8:49 PM  
Blogger Michael Reid said...

“Every act of creation is first of all an act of destruction"

Pablo Picasso

8:27 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home