Saturday, February 12, 2011

Riding a Tidal Wave of Whiskey on A Surfboard Made of I Don't Care



*

So far today I have:


1. Made a pot of coffee and forgot to drink any of it.

2. Made grilled chicken andouille sausages for breakfast and left them unattended in the grillevator until they were nothing more than shrunken, blackened twisted up snakes throwing off acrid smoke that filled the house.

3. Repeated # 2.

4. Ate toast instead.

5. Still forgot to drink the coffee.

6. Got in the shower right after I loaded the washing machine with whites, which I wash in hot water.

7. Took cold shower with tiny, hard sliver of soap.

8. Tried to brush my teeth with my whiz-bang electric toothbrusher.

9. Toothbrush will not turn off. It's still sitting there buzzing in the soap caddy.

10. Got under the heavy dinner table to wait out the rest of the day.


*


Namaste.


***

12 Comments:

Blogger plantingalongtheverge.com said...

oh dear.....
please don't burn the house down before I get back!


Lu will gladly keep you company under the table as
long as you can still use your hands.
I'm having the same sort of day.....locked us out of the house while demonstrating the " broken" lock :0/

you so crazy.
I love you like that.....stay safe.

11:22 AM  
Blogger tearful dishwasher said...

i think i'm just going to stay under the table until it's time to go get you at the airport.


i need adult supervision at all times.



i love you truly, madly, deeply.


yrs-


dummy

11:48 AM  
Blogger Ms. Moon said...

That woman is getting home just in time, I think.
I burned our "special Valentine's Day dessert" last night but I sure as hell remembered to drink my coffee this morning.

11:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

this is so funny!

you need yolie home. and she needs to be there.

two parts that make a whole. this makes me feel really, really happy.

thanks, you people!!

12:09 PM  
Blogger Petit fleur said...

A cold shower? Really? Wow.

Hang in there.
Peace,
pf
ps I don't think you need the coffee anyway. Sounds like you are bit amped already. :-0

1:51 PM  
Blogger 37paddington said...

i love that drawing of you.

something about the eyes though. they seem hurt.

i hope you can sleep off the i don't care under that table. i don't really believe you don't care though.

and thank you.

2:18 PM  
Blogger tearful dishwasher said...

PF-

Not amped. Opposite of amped.

De-amped.

4:13 PM  
Blogger tearful dishwasher said...

Angella-

I almost always look happy in person.

Maybe.


And you're right. I do care.


ha.


yrs-


Scott

4:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great Day! How many days do I have like that? Let me count thy ways! Because you did write this about ME, right? Isn't all of life about ME? ME, ME, ME, under the dining room table hiding from the electric toothbrush and cold water, wishing the freakin coffee would come serve ME...

8:02 AM  
Blogger tearful dishwasher said...

Hey, AShea!

Welcome to the land of broken toys.

And of course it's all about you, who else could it be about?

yrs-

tearful

8:56 AM  
Blogger Radish King said...

I almost always look happy in person.

This made me laugh so hard I almost found the energy to get up from this damned chair. And I thank you because if I don't go get food I will die. There. You have done something miraculous today. Off to the store.

love,
Rebecca

12:24 PM  
Blogger tearful dishwasher said...

Radish-

It is funny, huh.


Get food. Don't die.


love-

the miracle worker

12:56 PM  

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