Sunday, January 23, 2011

love is the engine of the world


I'm back home after four days in Vegas. A trade show for guns and various tactical gear. State of the art, bleeding edge ways to kill people, plus gambling.

I didn't gamble.

It was fun, in a kind of nightmarish way.


But best of all was coming home again. To the woman on the verge and the bull dog. To our home sweet home and the stillness and quiet and deep, deep comfort of it.

The love in our home will knock you down. It does me.


I'm nearing fifty and I'm still a mystery to myself. Mostly I can't figure out why I can't fix what's wrong with me. These stubborn flaws. Bad for me, bad for those around me, bad for the world, yet I can't get a handle on them.

Can't or won't, one.

Ah, well, what's interesting about perfection?

Not a damn thing.


Last week I found the skull of a small animal on one of my runs. I picked it up and brought it home and asked the woman on the verge if she could clean it up for me.

Which she did.

Run and tell that, home boy.


I'm going to make falafel tonight. I'm craving musky flavors melded with garlic and bright lemon, bread and yogurt and kalamata olives, crunch and chew and smoke and thrill.


There is stone at the center of my heart.





Blogger Wendy said...

I will take with me that there are those in the world who find the ordinary extraordinary (an animal skull while out running)...and then there are the extraordinary women who love them.

3:17 PM  
Blogger Ms. Moon said...

I have no idea why (oh yes, I do) but this made me cry.
I am so glad you are not perfect, dear Dishwasher. So very glad.

3:42 PM  
Blogger 37paddington said...

i love the girls. i want to climb into the frame and wade into the water a little way down from them, so as not to disturb their dance.

I can't fix what wrong with me either.

9:05 PM  
Blogger michelle said...

there is no stone at the center of your heart

just sayin

4:14 AM  
Blogger susan t. landry said...

god knows, i can get into the "fixing what's wrong" dialogue...but at this point in my life i am trying very hard to see it --the "what's wrong" part -- the way i deal with my dishwasher. the damn thing leaks; it costs too much to have a professional come and tell me that the damn thing leaks, so i put a towel on the floor when i use it.
the dishes get clean.
it's always great -- and provocative-- to hear what youre thinking about, scott.

7:04 AM  
Blogger melissashook said...

a clean skull,that's something...
thank you...

2:31 PM  
Blogger Pamela Johnson Parker said...

If there is a stone at the center of your heart, it is a ruby--precious and shining and passionate for your family and your art and your job.

(no foolin')

5:14 PM  
Blogger Mim said...

Peach stone,
freestone peaches . . .


3:52 PM  

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