All The El Caminos of the West
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"Alison, I know this world is killing you...."
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Settling into the solitude now that its almost gone. Spent all day yesterday painting. Really painting, on a canvas. Started at about six in the morning, set up in the kitchen of all places, and knocked off at four having missed coffee, breakfast, lunch, etc.
Then I cleaned up, put a frozen pizza in the oven, poured myself a drink, and watched television with the dog. Got up every five minutes to look at the painting.
Think I'll do the same today.
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I have discovered that my real deep joy in cooking is really about cooking for my wife.
And my real deep joy in living is really about living with my wife.
God help me.
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Namaste.
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12 Comments:
This is a favourite post of mine.
Oh man, this one too. I think I know Allison.
Liza-
Thanks. Glad you like it.
D-
thanks. I think we all want to go stand at the end of the road sometimes.
yrs-
scott
My deep joy in cooking feels exactly like my deep joy in writing and my deep joy in playing Bach.
Yesterday at Starbucks there was a giant spider on my car window edge whatever it's called after the window rolls down he wanted in. The girl in the store yelled and her friends came over and yelled so I flicked the spider with my little wad of dollars and I was fine with it but the girls insisted I drive forward get out and shake out my clothes which happened to be my pajamas of course naturally but I did and since I live on Aurora no one noticed a middle aged woman shaking around in her pajamas at 5:30 in the morning then I had to get back in my car and back up to get my coffee.
This morning I went to Safeway to get some apple juice and when I got back in my car that damned spider dropped as casual as can be from the back ceiling and he was big as a Kennedy half dollar not a spider I want to take along on a ride and I jumped out of my car (fully clothed) and I kind of SQUWEEEEd and this man walking by a BIG man asked if I was ok and I told him there was a giant spider in my car and he offered to take care of it for me and this filled me with joy and intense love for the universe in general but I told him thank you but I was ok and Igrabbed some paper (poem notes) and squished that spider to Kingdom Come as they used to say in church and other less savory places and I placed him neatly in the Recycle Here bin.
Alison lives inside me.
love,
Rebecca
wv: cornall
Dear Radish-
It's so damn good to hear from you.
I'm glad that big guy was willing to kill for you. The universe really does love you, in particular, you know.
Peace be upon you.
Don't get too settled in!
Never happen.
see you in a few days now!
lurve-
me
I have always been in love with the word "uxorious". I can't see why excessive fondness for one's wife can be anything but good.
I second that, my friend.
And my real deep joy in living is really about living with my wife.
God help me.
I came here because a friend thought this post reminded her of the joy I find in my life.
And I can see why.
I do understand this post so deeply.
Beautiful.
Craig-
If you have a deep and abiding joy in your own life, you've got shit figured out pretty good.
Everything else will take care of itself.
The world is full of unhappy people who figured out how to get rich, have stuff, be powerful, run a business, etc. but never learned to appreciate it, never learned how fucking holy this moment right here is.
I'm glad for you that you've found it.
yrs-
Scott
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