Samsara, Wrong Number.
I was thinking about this as an experiment. I've tried it, actually. What do you think?
Day 1-
Get up. Turn on the news, eat breakfast, read the paper, have coffee.
Go to work and listen to the news on the way.
Get to work, check email and headlines.
Work.
Talk with coworkers about politics and the war.
Work.
Eat lunch at McDonalds and hurry back to work.
Work. Think about how fucked up everything is.
Stay late because you are behind.
Drive home fast and mad. Listen to the news on the way home.
Get home, turn on TV if it isn't already on.
Eat dinner in front of TV or with TV on, talk to family about the news.
Watch news.
Drink a beer or a glass of wine or three.
Watch a movie or sitcom until you fall asleep.
Crawl into bed and have nightmare.
Get up too early and turn on the news.
Days 2 through 2,000:
Repeat.
Experiment No. 2-
Day one:
Get up too early, lay in bed. Before you do anything, think about what kind of day you want to have. Imagine that this is the very last day you'll have, and that by eleven pm you will be cooling on a slab in a green-tiled basement room somewhere. Imagine that this is a secret and you can't let anyone know. Think about this for a second. Imagine all you'll miss. Notice how all your "problems" of money, stress, job, car, etc. vanish. Notice who you want to be with one last time.
Shower. Check yourself out as you do. Skin, how good it feels. Wiggle your toes. Soap up and let the hot water run all over your bad naked self. Mmmm....
Get dressed. No TV. No radio. No newspaper.
Eat breakfast. You can have whatever you want. Eat it slowly and savor each bite. Don't talk.
Just eat and drink.
Put dishes in sink, wash them, dry them, put them away.
Kiss family members good bye and tell them you love them.
Go to work. No radio. No iPod, etc. If driving, roll down window and listen and breathe. Look around.
Smile at someone.
You may sing as loudly as you wish for as long as you wish. You may tap your toes and the steering wheel.
Go to work and really notice and greet and listen to the first five people you see. Imagine that they are going to be dead by the end of the day, too. Find out something about them you didn't know but that they've always wanted to tell someone if only someone would ask them.
Ignore email. No internet.
Take on the first task and really settle in to it. Breathe. Get it's shape and depth and width and go do exactly what it asks of you to completion.
Take a break. Walk around, get a glass of water. Go say "hi" to the boss and to someone like the guy who empties the trash- go up the chain to the top and down the chain to the bottom. Treat both people the same, that is, as if they were the most important person in your life at that moment.
Go back to work.
Lunch. Eat somewhere new and take a friend and no TV, radio, newspapers, sports talk, bullshit. Just eat in silence, or ask them questions like "What's the happiest you've ever been?" or "What's the best thing you ever did for someone?" and then listen till they are finished.
Go for a walk.
Go back to work and do what's asked of you with a grateful heart and as if it is the last, best, most important thing you'll ever do.
Drive home and watch the sunset or the nightfall and no radio, news, etc. Sing if you like.
Get home and turn off the TV. Eat dinner with family. Savor each bite, savor the faces of your loved ones gathered around you.
Go for a walk in the dark after dinner. Bring anyone who'll come with you.
Read a book for an hour and have a glass of wine unless you are an alcoholic, then have a glass of water or tea.
Listen to your family as they get ready for bed, and check in with them for the last time. Remember, you'll be dead
in an hour or so now, so really let them have your full attention. They can't catch on, only you know what's coming.
But pay attention.
Lie down in bed and look up at the ceiling and replay the day in your mind. Notice the things you did that caused pain to others or yourself, and promise yourself you'll try not to repeat those kinds of actions. Notice the things that you did that made others feel good, smile, etc. and promise you'll try to do more of those things.
Fall asleep knowing that tomorrow you will die.
Day 2 through ??
Repeat.
Day 1-
Get up. Turn on the news, eat breakfast, read the paper, have coffee.
Go to work and listen to the news on the way.
Get to work, check email and headlines.
Work.
Talk with coworkers about politics and the war.
Work.
Eat lunch at McDonalds and hurry back to work.
Work. Think about how fucked up everything is.
Stay late because you are behind.
Drive home fast and mad. Listen to the news on the way home.
Get home, turn on TV if it isn't already on.
Eat dinner in front of TV or with TV on, talk to family about the news.
Watch news.
Drink a beer or a glass of wine or three.
Watch a movie or sitcom until you fall asleep.
Crawl into bed and have nightmare.
Get up too early and turn on the news.
Days 2 through 2,000:
Repeat.
Experiment No. 2-
Day one:
Get up too early, lay in bed. Before you do anything, think about what kind of day you want to have. Imagine that this is the very last day you'll have, and that by eleven pm you will be cooling on a slab in a green-tiled basement room somewhere. Imagine that this is a secret and you can't let anyone know. Think about this for a second. Imagine all you'll miss. Notice how all your "problems" of money, stress, job, car, etc. vanish. Notice who you want to be with one last time.
Shower. Check yourself out as you do. Skin, how good it feels. Wiggle your toes. Soap up and let the hot water run all over your bad naked self. Mmmm....
Get dressed. No TV. No radio. No newspaper.
Eat breakfast. You can have whatever you want. Eat it slowly and savor each bite. Don't talk.
Just eat and drink.
Put dishes in sink, wash them, dry them, put them away.
Kiss family members good bye and tell them you love them.
Go to work. No radio. No iPod, etc. If driving, roll down window and listen and breathe. Look around.
Smile at someone.
You may sing as loudly as you wish for as long as you wish. You may tap your toes and the steering wheel.
Go to work and really notice and greet and listen to the first five people you see. Imagine that they are going to be dead by the end of the day, too. Find out something about them you didn't know but that they've always wanted to tell someone if only someone would ask them.
Ignore email. No internet.
Take on the first task and really settle in to it. Breathe. Get it's shape and depth and width and go do exactly what it asks of you to completion.
Take a break. Walk around, get a glass of water. Go say "hi" to the boss and to someone like the guy who empties the trash- go up the chain to the top and down the chain to the bottom. Treat both people the same, that is, as if they were the most important person in your life at that moment.
Go back to work.
Lunch. Eat somewhere new and take a friend and no TV, radio, newspapers, sports talk, bullshit. Just eat in silence, or ask them questions like "What's the happiest you've ever been?" or "What's the best thing you ever did for someone?" and then listen till they are finished.
Go for a walk.
Go back to work and do what's asked of you with a grateful heart and as if it is the last, best, most important thing you'll ever do.
Drive home and watch the sunset or the nightfall and no radio, news, etc. Sing if you like.
Get home and turn off the TV. Eat dinner with family. Savor each bite, savor the faces of your loved ones gathered around you.
Go for a walk in the dark after dinner. Bring anyone who'll come with you.
Read a book for an hour and have a glass of wine unless you are an alcoholic, then have a glass of water or tea.
Listen to your family as they get ready for bed, and check in with them for the last time. Remember, you'll be dead
in an hour or so now, so really let them have your full attention. They can't catch on, only you know what's coming.
But pay attention.
Lie down in bed and look up at the ceiling and replay the day in your mind. Notice the things you did that caused pain to others or yourself, and promise yourself you'll try not to repeat those kinds of actions. Notice the things that you did that made others feel good, smile, etc. and promise you'll try to do more of those things.
Fall asleep knowing that tomorrow you will die.
Day 2 through ??
Repeat.
posted by tearful dishwasher at 7:16 PM
5 Comments:
You bring up an interesting point. It's true that these are mind games just like any other mind game, and not, in the long run, any more beneficial than the escapes of drinking, drugs, tv, sex, long distance running...
Essentially anything that requires effort becomes its own
kind of failure.
But there is a 'moving toward' quality that I engage in....say the target is 'stillness' or 'non-effort' but I'm far from that so I'm still 'doing' and 'trying to do' all the time. So why not 'do' and 'try to do' things that are somehow 'closer' to the goal of doing less?
Yeah, okay, so that doesn't even make sense to me.
Another way to go at it is this- these two 'experiments' allow you to glimpse that your own actions and your own 'way of seeing' do have an effect on your perceived reality. You do 'this' for this many days, you see and feel 'that' (ie- immerse yrself in news and media and things look really bad in a little while. remove the media and focus on love and family, things look, if not better, at least different.) Do this 'other' for a while, the world changes.
so this insight leads to the tentative understanding of the possible 'malleability' of reality, at least on a personal level (all that matters?) ....
anyway.
Cool thing to wrestle with.
Thanks for your thoughts. I enjoy your input a great deal.
All the best-
Scott
Anything that requires effort becomes its own kind of failure. Could one then say conversely: Any kind of failure requires its own effort?
And, regarding your experiement, isn't the real question: What do YOU think, Scott? Can you live every day like that? Live every day as if you were going to die?
I admire you for trying. I think it's tough to live in a constant state of bliss. To live consciously, deliberately. To take and accept responsibility for every minute of your life. You be the guru. You lead the way. You be the shining example. I'll watch you glow and maybe that will inspire me to give it a shot myself.
What's that the Indians would say before riding into battle? Today is a good day to die.
I'd like to think I have it in me to be that brave.
Thanks for making me stop and think about how I'm living my life. And why.
Well.
You're welcome.
C'mon. Let's do it together.
yrs-
Scott
Well, yes, there is an inherent contradiction in trying not to try, in moving towards stillness, etc. It beats me what I'm up to ultimately, but I know that these explorations help me to be better to myself, to be more simply myself...the idea that there are these dualities we exist with on this plane (the only one we really have consistent access to) and that we make room for them at the same time that we might 'nudge' against them to try to achieve a slightly better symmetry...well, it makes some things easier to handle for me.
I'm happy to be bouncing these ideas around with you.
Thanks.
Scott
You really are exploring!
I'm glad of it.
yr new friend-
Scott
Post a Comment
<< Home